Thursday, June 28, 2012 | By: Drotuno

Coming Home Chapter 48 - Edward


From: EAMasen
To: Bella Swan
Date Sent: Thur, May 20, 2010 at 4:23 A.M.
Date Received: Wed, May 19, 2010 at 4:23 P.M.
Subject: I think a unicorn ran through the barracks...

My beautiful girl,

These pain meds are strong. Like...sweet dreams that make no sense, but you don't want them to end kind of strong. O_o You'll be happy to know that you were in all of them. I didn't know you knew how to swing on a trapeze. I'm sure you can't. **snort** My brain cells will never be the same, I'm sure of it. At least I can think more clearly this morning.

You'll also be happy to know that I've been removed from duty for the next few days – at least for the rest of the weekend. The docs told me two days, but my CO, Stephens, said to take a few more. I'm to rest, only do necessary things, and report back on Monday.

I can't apologize enough for scaring you, love. I think I was scared more for what would happen to you than what actually happened. I never want us to end, Bella. At all. And one mistake could do that. All I could think of between that initial hit and hitting the button to call you was that this was the reality of our situation and it would blatantly show you exactly what I'd been trying to tell you from the start...that I couldn't make you promises. I can try to be safe, try to make smart decisions out in the field, but I can't account for others. Insurgents, fellow squad members, or even a civilian could make a choice that affects me, affects my life.

There was a part of me that was sure that you wouldn't want to deal with this, that you'd end our call, but you didn't. Fuck, baby, you're so strong...stronger than you give yourself credit for. It's okay that you freaked out, because with that freak out came the most beautiful words from you.

Bella, I don't think you understand how much I've fallen in love with you. It's beyond anything I've ever felt. Aside from my parents, I don't think I've ever meant it as much as when I said those words to you. You're so beautiful, but you're wholly beautiful – inside and out. I'm absolutely certain that I fell in love with your spirit before I saw that angelic face. You're everything I need to get through these next few months, and we can do this.

You asked about my plans for when October comes, and up until you flew into my life, I honestly had no answer. I would've probably told you that I would have re-upped, put in for something stateside, and continued on with my military career. I have no home, sweetheart. I'm not telling you that to make you feel sorry for me, but when my parents died, I pulled up roots. Period. Nothing Tanya said, nothing her parents said, or even anything my lawyer advised made a difference. I had no plans to go back. I couldn't keep the house I grew up in because there were too many memories – good ones – and I wanted to keep them that way. Coming back to that house without my parents living there anymore would've ruined it.

Now...things have completely changed. I have you. You are home to me. And despite the fact that I've never even visited Washington, it's the only place I can think to go. When I think of home, it's your gorgeous face that I see. Em and Jazz have repeatedly told me that they, you, and the girls are my family now. That when we're done here, that's where they're taking me. There is no choice in the matter.

I want to build a life with you, whatever that entails. I have to figure out what to do as a career, but I will take care of you. Everything that my parents left behind is now mine. Money isn't an issue, and I have plans on spoiling you like crazy – in every definition of the word. And I don't mean that in some sort of controlling way, Bella. I mean that I want to figure us out together. We can live together or not, we can get as many kittens as you want, or we can take us slow. I don't care. As long as I have you, I'll be a happy man.

I want to spoil you with gifts, devotion, time... I want to see your classroom, where you live, where you sleep. Definitely where you sleep, my love. My heart, body, and soul belong to you. I wasn't kidding you when we Skyped. You own me. I want to feel your body wrapped around mine, make you call my name as I move inside you, and leave you so sated that you can still feel me at the end of the day. I want to whisper that I love you over every inch of your skin.

You are my life now.

Does that answer your question that you were so nervous about asking? Hmm? DON'T be afraid to ask anything of me. Ever.

Em and Jazz are telling me to take my meds now. Apparently, I've been wincing too much. If that's the case, then I need to end this, because there's no telling what I'll say. LOL

Email when you can, and remember that I love you and I'm okay. I promise.

Yours always,

P.S. I'll take the e-smooches, love, but I'm NOT telling Emmett to do it. Not only would he actually kiss me, but he'd record it and send it to you. Umm...just no. LOL



Evelyne-raconte said...

They are mean to be together.
It's so nice, every night to have an alert for a new (or 2) chapter of COMING HOME. Such a pleasure to read Bella's and Edward's POV. Thank you for the ride.

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