Friday, July 6, 2012 | By: Drotuno

Coming Home Chapter 64 - Edward


From: EAMasen
To: Bella Swan
Date Sent: Tues, June 01, 2010 at 9:14 P.M.
Date Received: Tues, June 01, 2010 at 12:14 P.M.
Subject: I don't want FREEDOM, Bella...

I want you.

Did you really think that just because I was out of a dangerous situation, I would just toss away everything we have, Isabella? Just throw out all that we've built so far? Do you think so little of what I've told you that you would doubt me that much? You need to understand something right now! I wasn't writing you, calling you, telling you things about myself that I'd never told anyone just to bide my fucking time. You weren't...aren't just a plaything for me, Bella.

My sweet, sweet girl, I love YOU. I don't want just someone. I don't want German women, Florida girls, or anyone else, for that matter. I'm not looking to just get laid. I don't want something empty or something just for a few hours. Yes, I do have opportunities to to do those things, Bella. I won't lie to you. And I know exactly what to do with them all... I fucking tell them no! There's nothing on this Earth that I want more than to come home to you, and I'm willing to wait. You're everything I've ever needed, wanted, or never even knew existed in not only a girlfriend, but my best friend.

You're right about a few things. I didn't have freedoms when I was younger. Yes, I took care of my parents. Yes, I was in a very unfulfilled relationship with Tanya. Yes, I answer to superiors in the Army every second of the damn day, but our definition of FREEDOM is completely different.

The word freedom for me conjures up images of you – of being able to truly be with you, to love you like I dream about. I want to kiss you, hand you my heart, body, and soul, and make love to you until we can't even see straight. Bella, you're all I think about. All the fucking time. Freedom to me means that I can finally be with the one person who I can tell anything to, who makes me laugh even hours after I've spoken to them, and who taught me how to smile again. There are no more "rare moments" anymore, my Bella. That's thanks to you.

Jesus, sweetheart, I know this is hard. It hasn't exactly been easy from the get-go, but I promise you that I can survive whatever hell has to offer as long as you're on the other side waiting for me. Please, please, please don't let that beautiful strength you have inside you fail me now. Don't lose faith in us, love. We can do this. And I swear to God, it's a choice I've made without hesitation. None. Period.

I'm so in love with you, Isabella Swan. The only thing that's driving me crazy is that I've got the most beautiful and caring thing on the other side of the world waiting for me, and I can't make time go any faster to get to her. I want it all with you, my love. I can see spending the rest of my life with you, playing the piano, sleeping in on the weekends, making love anytime we get the urge (which will be often, if I have anything to say about it), and picking out kittens. ;)

Miss Swan, did you so quickly forget the things I sent to you? You're not the only one worried that someone could so easily swoop in and take away the one thing that means everything. I hate that Mike wants you back, that Jacob hit on you, that any night out at a club, you could choose to not spend the night alone. It KILLS me to think that, but it's there. I sent you the picture of my parents so you would understand that I'm not taking anything between us lightly, baby. Nothing about our relationship is disposable to me.

At the beginning of this relationship, I couldn't make you promises. I can now. I promise you that you're the only woman for me, Bella. That's the only truth I know, and I don't know how to convince you that you're it for me.

You own my heart, beautiful. It's not mine anymore.

Yours always,

P.S. Oh, and Bella... The house in Tampa? We decided to rent it because we thought maybe we'd want three girls to visit, and private bedrooms would be a hell of a lot better than the fucking barracks at the base. Okay?



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